1) Trust yourself.
"Believe In yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers, you cannot be successful or happy.'' - Norman Vincent Peale
We become what we believe we are. Our beliefs are what keeps us going on in our lives.
One very quickly limits themselves if everything is impossible. Anything is possible with a firm belief that you can do whatever you desire. If you feel like you are lacking that trust in yourself, then the best way is to look in the mirror and talk to yourself. Yes, this certainly might feel a bit awkward, but talking to yourself in the mirror is a confidence-building exercise that many successful people use.
These steps will help you understand how to look in the mirror and talk to yourself and gain self-confidence:
How to do?
- Step 1: Stand in front of a mirror (the bigger the mirror is, the better). Let the weight of your body be equally divided.
- Step 2: Straighten your back and take a deep breath and look yourself in the eyes confidently.
- Step 3: Put a light smile on your face so that you look determined.
- Step 4: Start talking to your reflection by saying things like “I believe in myself!”, “I can!”, “Every day I get 1% better.” or “I know what I want and aren’t afraid to get it.”
- Step 5: Think about the things you want to achieve and say that you can get them, and there is nothing that can stop you on your way to success. Continue breathing as deep as you can and generate only positive statements and thoughts for at least 5-10 minutes.
You can always make it longer and add things, for instance, what you love most about yourself, your best qualities and recognition so far. It’s not about bragging and vanity, but it’s about starting to believe in yourself, your potential and possibilities.
How often should you do this?
- It is best to do it in the morning, preferably as a part of your morning routine. This way you can start your day with energy and go out with confidence.
- Some prefer doing it in the evening or simply whenever they need self-esteem. All you need is to find a mirror and five minutes alone to spend in front of it.
Do this technique at least twice every day and make this a part of your daily routine because the magic, happens in the long term.
2) Decide who you want to become.
"If You don't know where you are going you might not get there." - Yogi Berra
The crucial part of shaping your future is deciding who you actually want to be. As you go through life and work toward your dreams, knowing who you are and who you aspire to be will remain the keys to your success. Except becoming who you want to be isn’t easy. It requires tremendous courage, perseverance and a steadfast belief in yourself.
Follow these simple points and it will help you understand who you want to become:
- There are some decisions you need to make that is more important than the goals you set for defining what you want to have in your life. These are the decisions that will define who you want to be. Who you are will decide your life far more than the environment you try to create around you.
- Every day visualize clearly the person you want to become. Let the visualization be vivid and precise. How does this person talk? How does this person dress? How does this person solve problems? How does it feel to be this person? Ask yourself these questions as you visualize your ideal self. Think hard about whether you are congruent with who you want to be.
- Who you want to be isn’t a goal, immediately you are whoever you decide to be. The moment you decide that you are going to be a happy, enthusiastic, passionate person, you become one. Simply make sure that all of your actions are aligned with this new image and you will move towards this life.
- If you see yourself as optimistic and enthusiastic and you are surrounded by friends who are depressed and negative, being who you want to be will be challenging. If you see yourself as being organized and precise and you are surrounded by mess and confusion, your environment will strain against the vision you’ve set for yourself. Don’t allow these barriers to be existing. Start shaping your environment to reflect the image you see for yourself. By having your environment reinforce your identity, being who you want to be is far easier.
3) Build your resources.
"Amateurs sit and wait for inspiration, the rest of us just get up and go to work." - Stephen King
Let's say your goal is to become an entrepreneur. But first, you must have access to all the resources to become one –meaning, you have to work very hard from now to ensure that you have sufficient funds and the time to start a business along with a successful idea. If you are setting clear goals with deadlines, then you already know what to do to get the results you want.
Follow these steps and it will help you understand how to build your resources:
- Step 1: Set Goals That Motivate You: When you set goals for yourself, it is important that they motivate you: this means making sure that they are important to you, and that there is value in achieving them. If you have little interest in the outcome, or they are irrelevant given the larger picture, then the chances of you putting in the work to make them happen are slim. Motivation is the key to achieving goals.
- Step 2: Set SMART Goals: You have probably heard of SMART goals already. But do you always apply the rule? The simple fact is that for goals to be powerful, they should be designed to be SMART. There are many variations of what SMART stands for, but the essence is this – goals should be:
- Time Bound.
Set Specific Goals
Your goal must be clear and well defined. Vague or generalized goals are unhelpful because they don't provide sufficient direction. Remember, you need goals to show you the way. Make it as easy as you can to get where you want to go by defining precisely where you want to end up.
Set Measurable Goals
Include precise amounts, dates, and so on in your goals so you can measure your degree of success. If your goal is simply defined as "To reduce expenses" how will you know when you have been successful? In one month’s, time if you have a 1 percent reduction or in two years' time when you have a 10 percent reduction? Without a way to measure your success, you miss out on the celebration that comes with knowing you have actually achieved something.
Set Attainable Goals
Make sure that it's possible to achieve the goals you set. If you set a goal that you have no hope of achieving, you will only demoralize yourself and erode your confidence.
However, resist the urge to set goals that are too easy. Accomplishing a goal that you didn't have to work hard for, can be ineffective and can also make you fear setting future goals that carry a risk of non-achievement. By setting realistic yet challenging goals, you hit the balance you need. These are the types of goals that require you to "raise the bar" and they bring the greatest personal satisfaction.
Set Relevant Goals
Goals should be relevant to the direction you want your life and career to take. By keeping goals aligned with this, you'll develop the focus you need to get ahead and do what you want. Set widely spread and inconsistent goals, and you'll waste your time and your life away.
Set Time-Bound Goals
Your goals must have a deadline. Again, this means that you know when you can celebrate success. When you are working on a deadline, your sense of urgency increases, and achievement will come that much quicker.
- Step 3: Set Goals in Writing: The physical act of writing down a goal makes it real and tangible. You have no excuse for forgetting about it. As you write, use the word "will" instead of "would like to" or "might." For example, "I will reduce my operating expenses by 10 percent this year," not "I would like to reduce my operating expenses by 10 percent this year." The first goal statement has power and you can "see" yourself reducing expenses, the second lacks passion and gives you an excuse if you get side-tracked.
- Step 4: Acquire Necessary Skills & Knowledge: Having the exact skill & knowledge is a crucial part of building resources. You must have the skill & knowledge of what goal you are going to achieve in order to usefully achieve it. You can enhance your skills & knowledge by joining various training sessions or institutes or read expert career advice and articles from various websites over the internet which will help you to gain the necessary skills & knowledge.
- Step 5: Make an Action Plan: This step is often missed in the process of building resources. You get so focused on the outcome that you forget to plan all of the steps that are needed along the way. By writing out the individual steps, and then crossing each one off as you complete it, you'll realize that you are making progress towards your ultimate goal. This is especially important if your goal is big and demanding, or long-term.
4) Do not be afraid to raise your voice.
"Truth never damages a cause that is just." - Mahatma Gandhi
Don't be afraid to be controversial! Take that leap of faith. Not everyone will be on the same path or share the same point of view. In fact, giving opinions & taking criticism, rightly or wrongly, is what builds your character. Opinions fuel momentum. Ideas, plans, and decisions begin and end with opinions. Every great invention in this world was born from somebody’s opinion.
If you want everyone in the world to like your opinion, then with no doubt, you live in an imaginary world. If you have an opinion and have facts to back it up, then don’t be afraid to have conversations. Your opinion is based on your view and it doesn’t have to be theirs.
There are many ways to overcome the fear of raising your voice. Some of those are:
- As mentioned in the 1st point, look in the mirror and talk to yourself. It will help you gain self-confidence.
- Prepare a stage for yourself and start practicing on it. That stage could be any platform such as commenting or posting your opinions over the social media platforms, expressing your thoughts through blog posts or article writings, or even a simple talk to the closest person in your family member or friends.
- Read inspiring biographies of famous people from all around the world who were never afraid to address their opinions, this will help you motivate yourself.
- Stop scaring yourself with thoughts about what might go wrong. Instead, focus your attention on thoughts and images that are calming and reassuring.
- Be natural, be yourself and always remember that your voice is worth something, and your opinion matters.
5) There's nothing wrong in being afraid.
"There's nothing wrong with being afraid. It's not the absence of fear; it's overcoming it. Sometimes you've got to blast through and have faith." - Emma Watson
So, what if you are afraid to take that one big step in your life or start that new career path? Being afraid is the first step to overcoming fear and making the next step to take some meaningful actions. Learn to tackle that fear.
Here’s how you can tackle your fear:
- Notice your fears: Everything starts with awareness. Think about all the fears that are stopping you from being happy. Just observe them. This process is actually incredibly freeing. Once you do that, recognize that your fears, despite seeming very powerful, are not concrete walls. They can be dismantled and are less powerful than you think.
- Admit that you are afraid of particular things: Many people know what they are afraid of, but won't admit it, especially to themselves. This resistance will only give fear more power. Denial means you're running instead of facing. Only when you admit what you are afraid of can you start dissolving your fears.
- Decide you're sick of fear: Many therapists will try to encourage you to explore where your fears are coming from. It's true: they started somewhere, depending on your story. Often, they will ask questions intended to help you follow the fear all the way to its roots as a way to process it. Indeed, there is a therapeutic process to overcoming your fears which requires this kind of coaching. But you know what? At some point, you just have to make a choice to not be afraid anymore. At some point, you have to decide to enter the arena. Yes, you can actually choose to be less afraid. No, this doesn't mean your fear is just going to go away. But it will move the ball. It will create a shift. Examine where your fears are taking you in your life and make a decision, now, to no longer allow those fears to drive your life.
- Gratitude: Whenever you feel fear, switch it over to what you are grateful for instead. If you’re afraid of public speaking, be grateful for the opportunity to communicate with so many people, and that they are there to genuinely listen to what you have to say.
- Take a deep breath: Your breath can set you free. It can anchor you in the now and help you vanquish and overcome your most pervasive fears. I saved it for last because it’s one of the simplest and most powerful ways of overcoming fear.
- Approach a life coach: Life coaches have an important role to play in overcoming your fear. A life coach is a partner, someone who’s there for you through life’s most difficult and challenging times, able to guide you through and help you to see things differently, refine your approach and achieve your loftiest dreams. Unless we have an objective third-party actually point things out to us, we often fail to notice the things that are setting us back.
Are you dreaming about taking that one big step in your life or starting that new career path? No matter what you have been dreaming about, it is never too late to achieve your goals. Unless you trust yourself, decide who you want to become, build your resources and overcome your fear, your odds of success are considerably reduced. There are a lot of ways to help you overcome your fears and achieve your goals such as; talking to yourself in the mirror, reading inspiring biographies, seeking advice from a life coach or even taking a deep breath.
So, bring these 5 amazing thoughts to your life and start becoming the successful person you were always meant to be.